THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES

We are all experiencing this thing called the human experience, equipped with an ancestral brain wired to protect us from harm, suffering, and pain. There was a time when, as a species, we had to worry about being attacked by prehistoric predators while hunting and gathering our daily sustenance in the wild. With that level of stress and anxiety, it’s no wonder we are still hardwired for fight or flight. But because the conditions of life have shifted—and we now exist in an ecosystem of access and excess—fight or flight has mutated into suffering and stagnation.

We no longer live in those traumatic environmental conditions. Granted, in some scenarios, people are still on battlefields or struggling to secure food and shelter. But for the most part, we tell ourselves lies for one simple reason: to avoid failure and rejection—and, in my own case, to avoid success and the stress of living up to my full potential. 

Here are ten of the most common fibs we tell ourselves that keep us stuck. In the spirit of full transparency, these are all personal statements I have, at one time or another, directed at the person staring back at me in the mirror.

 

1. "I’m not good enough or smart enough."

The Lie: I lack the talent, skill, or intelligence to succeed.
The Truth: I am constantly growing, learning, and evolving. I strive to learn as much as I can because I know that the person with the most useful knowledge and the biggest heart always wins.

2. "I don’t have time."

The Lie: There’s not enough time in the day for my goals or passions.
The Truth: I make time for what truly matters. Even small, daily, consistent steps move me forward.

3. "I’ll do it when I’m ready."

The Lie: I should wait for the perfect moment, the perfect setup, the perfect smile, the perfect body, the perfect person, the perfect opportunity—but it never comes.
The Truth: The perfect time is now, and everything I need is already inside me. Action creates readiness, not the other way around.

4. "Failure means I’m not meant for this."

The Lie: Setbacks, failures, and rejections are proof that I’m not worthy or capable.
The Truth: Failure is feedback. Rejection is simply redirection in disguise. Every misstep is a lesson bringing me closer to success. I deserve to win!

5. "I have to do it alone."

The Lie: Asking for help is a weakness, and why would anyone want to invest in me?
The Truth: Strength is built in community. I welcome support, guidance, and collaboration. We are better together.

6. "People will judge me."

The Lie: Fear of judgment keeps me from showing up fully.
The Truth: God is my audience, not people. No one’s opinion defines my identity because my purpose is greater than their perception. I must anchor my "why" into something greater than myself or I will always fall victim to feedback.

7. "It’s too late for me."

The Lie: I’ve missed my chance. I’m either too young or too old to start.
The Truth: This is the perfect moment to begin—or begin again. Right here, right now, where my feet are planted, is exactly where I’ll start.

8. "I need to be perfect to be successful."

The Lie: I have to have everything figured out for it to work.
The Truth: Progress beats perfection. Taking imperfect action leads to real results. Let’s be real—hardly anything turns out exactly how we envision it. But as long as I lay the groundwork with pillars of love, service, generosity, and hospitality, what gets built is almost always better than what I could have imagined.

9. "I’m not creative."

The Lie: I don’t have the creative capacity to make anything meaningful or significant.
The Truth: Creativity is within me. The more I explore and express, the more it flows. Everything I do is a result of creativity—from the way I get dressed to the way I walk out the door. Even telling myself I’m not creative is, in itself, creative—because I’m making up a story so convincing that I almost believe it.

10. "I don’t deserve success or happiness."

The Lie: Deep down, I don’t feel worthy of good things. I don’t feel deserving of love at its highest level. I don’t believe I deserve the riches of this life because I’m not even sure I’d know how to handle them.
The Truth: I am absolutely deserving of success, love, and happiness. I am allowed to thrive. I was made to make an impact in this world and leave behind a fingerprint of love on everything I touch. It is both my privilege and my duty to live at my full potential. Every day, in every way, I am closing the gap between who I am and who I was made to be.

 

Breaking free from these self-limiting beliefs starts with awareness and intentional action. When you catch yourself falling into one of these mental traps, pause and challenge the thought. Ask yourself: Is this really true, or is it just a story I’ve been telling myself? Replace the lie with a truth that empowers you. Write it down, say it out loud, and embody it in your daily actions. Growth doesn’t happen overnight, but every time you choose truth over fear, you take another step toward the life you’re meant to build. Keep going—you are more capable than you realize.

Your friend,

Danny